Teddy Roosevelt said that “comparison is the thief of joy”
And he didn’t even live in our highly tech-dependent age where everything is about images. We compare how well we look against other gals, who’s engaged before who, how many followers, likes, comments and views… I mean, Y’ALL, there are now METRICS to help us compare even faster!
But we forget that we are part of lifting others up to Jesus. We are on the same team.
The world struggles to understand the Christian confidence because the world can’t see. We are not of the world. When we became alive spiritually, or, re-born, we were actually able to see, we started seeing everything different, we see our hopelessness and depravity & need for a Savior. We get it backwards when we let the world write our story. When we agree with the messages of this world’s media and propaganda and start to look at ourselves with a lens that evil has created, we lose that vision.
Our differences are what make us beautiful and pleasing to God and perfectly fitting to carry out His gorgeous symphony. Train your mind to be content by being grateful with exactly what you have.
Our imperfections, our character & our quirks… all of those things that make us who we are – make us stunning. Sure we would like everything to be PERFECT, but there is only one YOU, of such unique beauty. God will use our mess, our all, according to His perfect purpose & create something truly radiant within each of us. Replace every tendency to compare yourself with a full thankfulness of the God-ordained way you are.
There is NO “proving yourself” when you have an audience of one. 💗 There is only ONE we should be comparing ourselves to.
“As for God, his way is perfect; the word of the Lord is flawless. He is a shield for all who take refuge in him.” Psalm 18:30
So take refuge in Him alone. Seek your worth, your joy & your peace in Him.
Comparing ourselves to others deprives focus from what we should be loving about ourselves. It leads to envy & hurt…
“For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and every vile practice.” ~James 3:16
“A tranquil heart gives life to the flesh, but envy makes the bones rot.” ~Proverbs 14:30
3 Ways to Stop Comparing Yourself
1: Be Everyone’s Cheerleader
STORYTIME! When I was going into middle school – I asked my dad (who was his high school’s hunky quarterback) for his advice on how to be popular. His answer changed the way I approach my relationships. He said, “Be nice to everyone” and just like that – I became “popular” in the sense of everyone knew and liked me because I built them up. Life is too short to be a self-hating jealousy machine… That’s miserable. Own who you are and lift others up for being who they are. BUT if the pattern of comparing is too strong & you need to train your brain out of that, try #2….
2: Stop. Drop. Thank.
Stop the competitive thoughts. Right in that very moment.
Drop that pattern of thinking immediately. Don’t answer anymore harmful questions, like, “are her legs longer?” Those thoughts aren’t helpful, truthful, affirming, or joyful. Change those thoughts to “I admire her/him for ___ but God has something unique in store for me that only I can do.”
Thank God for the things you love about yourself – the things that you have that no one else does. Which brings me to #3….
3: Own It
Just do YOU! People who love what they’ve got are a lot more admirable & fun to be with than those who are doubting themselves – because insecurity is always worn on your face. Even if you’re not feeling 100%, fake it ’til you make it (this works – backed by psychology) & remember that everyone has days. EVERYONE!
So next time you feel a jealous bone or temptation to compare yourself, remember how much happier you’ll be in the long run, acceptance is the only long term solution to living in this world – this world that has upside-down morals and glorifies darkness over the light.
Make a list of 10/20/a million things that make you uniquely YOU! There will ALWAYS be something you want to change, but the positives will be defining traits in the woman God wants you to become. So for example…
Are you quirky (like me?) jot that down. I’m insecure about it at times, but my boyfriend loves that about me. I say funny/weird things and do the funny stuff that most (“normal”) girls are too nervous or insecure to do… AKA – UNIQUE, ladies!
Write down what you’re good at. Your best traits. The very things that make you happy. How you like to serve others. What God has done for you. What God says about you. Truth that others have spoken over you.
“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” ~Psalm 139:14
~P.S. You’re perfect